Blinding Oneself by Blaming Others

pexels-photo-684387.jpegBy Desmond Yeoh SC

We often blame others for our negative emotions such as anger, discontentment and loneliness. We fail to recognise that doing this blocks us from taking ownership of our own well-being and blinds us from our own faults. When we suffer from a physical illness, we quickly recognise that we have a problem and immediately seek medical attention. However, we do not act the same way when it comes to our emotional problems. The easy solution is always to blame others.

Anger can be a habitual tendency. Because it is our habit to get angry, our minds constantly seek out easy targets and reasons for us to get angry. Anger can generate hormones which stimulates the mind and hence can become addictive. We unconsciously choose to be angry! When we are at work, we direct our anger at our colleagues or business associates and when we are at home, our family members become our victim. The same reasoning applies to other forms of negative emotions.

So, the first step towards improving ourselves and progress spiritually is to stop blaming others. Whenever, we catch ourselves blaming others for our negative emotions, we should take note of it and let go of those thoughts[1].  If we can overcome this habit of playing the blame game, we would have made a significant progress on our spiritual path.

To solve a problem, we need to first recognise the problem. That is the first and major part of the process. Blaming others prevents us from even starting on this process. Without recognising the problem, we cannot hope to overcome it. When we visit the doctor, we must first be able to describe the symptoms we are suffering from. Only then can the doctor diagnose the problem and prescribe the right medication. The same applies to our negative emotional habits.

[1] See also Training the Mind through ‘Noting’ Meditation

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